Give The Gift of More Smiles & Less Worry.



When your child comes home ranting they didn’t do well on a test, that the grade was terrible but it wasn’t their fault, that the teacher didn’t prepare them, the topic was too hard, and the directions were confusing, what should you do? On the receiving end of this avalanche of frustration, start by listening (of course).  But after they are calmer, and their feelings are validated, what do they really need?

HELP. Clearly, they need help. It is highly unlikely it’s all the teacher’s fault they didn’t do well.  I have talked in this space before about preventing stress – by helping our kids get organized, prioritize, manage time better, and gain more perspective. But sometimes we need to empower them to ask for help.  Because while we know our children and their habits at home, we don’t know what they look like as learners in the classroom. Feeling overwhelmed and frustrated with things happening in school should be addressed in school. And rather than sweep in on our white horses to save the day (i.e., email the teacher), giving children the words they need to help themselves is much more valuable. Having the language to ask for help does a few important things:

  • It teaches them how to initiate important conversations.
  • It shows them that they have the power to improve their own situation.
  • It helps them take responsibility for their own learning.
  • It allows them to see how learning is a process, a back-and-forth, and that speaking up can create a better result.

Most importantly, it shows them that asking for help is one of the most important life skills they can develop. It is a strength to know yourself well enough to know when you’re in over your head, or you don’t understand something, or you thought you knew but were wrong! Making mistakes is part of the learning process. Showing children they can take initiative to do better for themselves means less stress, and more success.

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